SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING
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In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and
productivity from employees, it will be our policy to keep all
employees well trained though our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY
TRAINING (S.H.I.T.). We are trying to give our employees more
S.H.I.T. than anyone else.
If you feel that you do not receive your share
of S.H.I.T. on the job, please see your manager. You will be
immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T. list, and our managers
are especially skilled at seeing that you get all the S.H.I.T. you
can handle.
Employees who don't take their S.H.I.T., will
be placed in DEPARTMENTAL EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P.
S.H.I.T.) Those who fail to take D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T. seriously will
have to go to EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T. S.H.I.T.). Since
our managers took S.H.I.T. before they were promoted, they don't
have to do S.H.I.T. anymore and are full of S.H.I.T. already.
If you are full of S.H.I.T., you may be
interested in other job training. We can add your name to our BASIC
UNDERSTANDING LECTURE LIST (B.U.L.L. S.H.I.T.).
Those who are full of B.U.L.L. S.H.I.T. will
get the S.H.I.T. jobs, and apply for promotion to DIRECTOR OF
INTENSITY PROGRAMMING (D.I.P. S.H.I.T.).
If you have further questions please direct
them to our HEAD OF TRAINING, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T.
S.H.I.T.).
Thank you,
BOSS IN GENERAL
SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING
(B.I.G. S.H.I.T.)
